Baggage
by Shewritesstuff
Summary: It takes a girl with super human strength to carry all that baggage Roy Harper has. Cassie Sandmark only hopes she doesn't trip over this. (T for now might change the ratings later)
1. Chapter 1

**Pairing: **Cassie Sandsmark (Wonder Girl)/Roy Harper (Arsenal) – Wondergun

**Genre: **Romance (with maybe a hint of angst sprinkled here and there)

**Summary: **It takes a girl with super human strength to carry all that baggage Roy Harper has. Cassie Sandsmark only hopes she doesn't trip over this.

**Warnings: **None for now.

**A/N: **This will be a multichaptered fic I am literally making up as I go along. This chapter is pretty short. Basically the story is written pretending the Blue Beetle betrayal never happened (Author's in denial, sue me). Feedback will encourage the plot bunnies to breed. (Usual disclaimers apply).

**CHAPERT ONE**

Cassandra Sandsmark was what M'gann M'orzz once called _the perfect romantic comedy lead_ and everyone laughingly agreed. With her awkward clumsiness and adorable shrugs and _those_ tracksuit bottoms – Yes, who wouldn't want a 104 minutes to turn Cassie into the girl at the end of a Sandra Bullocks/ Julia Roberts film.

Cassie was perky, she was blonde, she was spontaneous and she was prone to awkwardly shrinking into herself. In fact that happened approximately forty three times a day. Her constant aim to impress and be liked by everyone was thwarted by her inability to quite work out what made her feel so insecure about herself in the first place.

"You remind me of well – me at 17." M'gann giggled, a nostalgic look spread across her face. "And my ridiculous – "

"Hello Megan!" Karen and Barbara blurted out at the same time before M'gann could, causing all three girls to burst into laughter.

"Ehm thanks?" Cassie whispered unsure about how to take or respond to such a comment.

"No really Cass, you're adorable. I have this funny feeling someday – soon perhaps there is gonna be a guy who is going to feel exactly that way." M'gann explained, she gave a confident knowing smile, a smile that ushered Karen and Barbara to also begin showering Cassie all sort praise and advice about a love life the young Amazonian wasn't aware she even had.

Cassie shrugged and smiled back, trying not to think about the silly crush she had on Conner Kent, just in case the remnants of the psychic link would betray her secrets to the broody handsome Kryptonian's ex.

That flight back from Bialya filled with giggling and teasing felt like a century ago, but Cassie was finally beginning to buy into that ridiculous notion M'gann, Karen and Babs had taken to like she did to flying – a romance starring none other than Cassandra Sandsmark. She was over Conner Kent by now – the fastest way to get over even a total hunk like him was seeing how not over M'gann he was. But the problem wasn't lacking a Romeo to her Juliet as much as who that Romeo was.

The guy she had in mind, Roy Harper hyphen The Orginal, had no place being _anyone's_ leading man.

So how on earth was she going to explain that casting to her friends?

Her mentor Diana might have been a princess but as far as the girls were concerned Cassie was to be set up with a prince. Not a broken boy.

And Roy was broken, maybe beyond repair.

A new arm wasn't going to fix him that easily.

Roy's butt as he strutted to his seat to wait for the mission briefing to begin wasn't the only thing Cassie could see with her crystal blue eyes. He came with a _ton_ of baggage, the kind a girl like her might never get her head round. She was blonde, not stupid.

Arm propped under her chin Cassie sighed miserably, wishfully staring across at Roy from her end of the table. She had been stuck with him in the warehouse for the entire morning, waiting for everyone else to arrive. But instead of making conversation she was keeping herself busy training up until a moment ago. After working up a sweat and releasing some of that pent up frustration, she found herself a quiet place to ponder about the potential problems she may have to deal with all because of a kiss.

_A stupid, stupid, stupid kiss._

When she kissed him, she didn't mean anything by it. Well, maybe she did – _a little_. But it was a peck not a promise to bear his children. A quick peck on the cheek, which like most things Cassie did, she did without thinking. She wasn't going to turn into a blushing puddle of gooey substance whenever she saw Roy. Not over a spontaneous and ill-judged peck.

_No way in hell. No matter how good he smelled._

At least that is what she told herself.

"You're staring at me again."

It took a moment for the voice to pull Cassie out of her thoughts.

There he was, Roy Harper no longer just on her mind but also staring right back at her with a curious look on his perfect face.

"What – no I wasn't." She hit herself in the face trying to sit up straight and act casual.

"Yes you were. You have been doing it all day." It wasn't an angry tone, in fact he sounded rather pleased. It made Cassie's ears burn like the pits of Hades.

It was too late to scramble now.

"No matter, I wouldn't have noticed if I weren't looking in the first place." Roy's grin suggested he was doing far more than just looking at her. Cassie violently shook her head, she could barely handle the fact she got caught undressing him with her eyes – but to know he was doing the same?

"Girl not goo, I'm a girl _not_ goo. Girl. Not. Goo." She muttered rapidly under her breath. "Get a grip!" Cassie slapped herself for good measure.

"Excuse me?" For the first time Roy sounded startled.

No idea how to respond Cassie gnawed at the insides of her cheeks unable to even attempt a smile. She was beginning to feel desperate here, wondering how on earth she managed to get herself into this mess to begin with. Why hadn't all those hours working on being as stealthy as a Bat-person not paid off?

Roy was being remarkably patient, his eyes were still locked on her, an annoying know-it-all grin playing on his lips. Sadistic shit, the way he smirked at her so seductively was going to kill her. Cassie took a deep breath before tossing her hair back casually and throwing at the archer her best flirtatious smile.

_Damn it Wonder Girl, you're way in over your head here._

But it was too late to back out now.

Her mouth began to open.

And like always, as she did with everything, without a second thought she decided to _just go for it_.


	2. Chapter 2

**Pairing: **Cassie Sandmark (Wonder Girl)/Roy Harper (Arsenal) – Wondergun

**Genre: **Romance (with maybe a hint of angst sprinkled here and there)

**Summary: **It takes a girl with super human strength to carry all that baggage Roy Harper has. Cassie Sandmark only hopes she doesn't trip over this.

**Warnings: **This chapter is walks a fine line in terms of mild sexual content. But it might upset some people. You have been warned.

**A/N: **Some parts of this was really hard to write for obvious reasons (I don't want to spoil it). It might also be hard to read. If you want to talk about it feel free to ask – follow me tumblr at shewritesstuffmostly. (Usual disclaimers apply).

**CHAPTER TWO**

Playing things cool wasn't Cassie's strong suit. She went in hard and fast with most things and _then _dealt with the fall-out – usually by punching it into ground. However, that option would unfortunately put a stop to any possible relationship with the handsome archer.

So she had to find the balance between playing hard to get and yet imply that she was as interested as him. The art of seduction was a complicated subject and this was of those times she couldn't afford to get a D grade.

"Liking what you see? Surely your bag of _tricks_ and explosives has a camera?"

Or that was how it was supposed to sound and did in her brain rehearsal. In reality, what came out of Cassie's mouth might as well have been Hercules' fist ramming straight into any chance she had with Roy.

"Take a picture why don't you!" Was exactly Cassie blurted out instead of her carefully worded come-on.

BAM! Dreams obliterated.

It came across _seriously _aggressive, annoyed and uninterested. Cassie wished she could fade away like the nymph Ekho rather than stay here to face Roy's reaction.

Taken back for a moment by Cassie's harsh words Roy frowned. But he wasn't rendered speechless for too long.

"Right…" She could tell he was wondering how to approach this unfortunate development. Could he risk continuing to flirt with this girl especially knowing how she's gifted with strength from Mt. Olympus and could very well pulverise every bone in his body. Thankfully, cautiousness and common sense weren't exactly _his_ strong suit.

"Pictures, sure. I can do _something _about it if you're willing to _strike_ all the right poses?" Roy's voice was as smooth as chocolate sauce. At least one of them got it right, she told herself.

Cassie smiled but only for a brief moment.

Only Roy Harper would consider sexually harassing the daughter of Zeus a good idea, further evidence at how self-destructive and wrong he is for you Cassie, she groaned to herself.

"What do you say Wonder Girl?"

Cassie suddenly got up from her seat to walk over to him. Roy looked surprised as she sank into the seat next to him and shot him a wink. "Sure, if you're a better at shot with a camera than you were earlier today with a bow." Much smoother, Cassie congratulated herself on getting it right despite the amount of pressure she was under.

"If I remember correctly you were the one with excellent aim." Roy touched his cheek and smiled softly. He looked almost shy for a moment. It was enough to encourage Cassie to take it a step further and get up to slowly slide into the gap between his legs and the table.

Roy just stared at her standing in front of him, for a moment he was assessing the situation unsure how to progress. She could tell that he was surprised again. But like yesterday when she kissed, he also looked incredibly pleased.

"You're awfully close for me to take a decent picture." Roy whispered, his eyebrow was raised as he gave her a curious look.

"Well then, just rely on your memory to capture this moment."

And that's when Cassie leaned forward to kiss him on the cheek. The exact same place as last time.

"Don't question my aim, hotshot." With a simple smile she hopped onto the table and let her legs swing enjoying the distance between them. Let him come to me for once, Cassie thought sitting comfortably and looking down at him.

She caught him off-guard once more. She could tell by the way his eyes widened behind the mask a moment ago. Cassie was sure by now she could get used to that look on Roy Harper's face, in fact she liked startling him almost as much as she liked kissing him.

Kissing him, she wondered what those lips taste like. Possibly as good as his smile looked.

"No questioning that Wonder Girl. Only your motives." Roy leaned forward; his hands were suddenly on her knees where they rested for a moment before beginning to travel ever so slowly up the sides of her thighs. There his strong hands paused and clung to her. There wasn't a vast amount of pressure on Roy's hands, even the mechanical one which felt cool to the touch even on top of the fabric of her sweatpants. Not as frightfully cold as she thought it would be.

They were so close to each other now. Too close if Cassie hadn't wanted to be even closer.

Cassie leaned in slightly until the tip of their noses almost touched. There she stopped and laughed, "I'm an idiot." She whispered to herself shaking her head but before Roy could comment on the seemingly random sentence, Cassie planted a slow kiss right on his lips this time.

Cassie was impulsive and eager. It was her flaw but right now no one was complaining as she wrapped herself around Roy as tightly as she could. Somehow her tongue managed to foray into the cavern of his mouth. _How's that for stealthy_, an ecstatic voice in Cassie's mind squealed

Roy Harper definitely tasted as good as his smile looked and he smelled even better than Cassie Sandsmark could remember.

However good, things were moving a bit fast. Without a moment's notice she was flat on her back on the table with Roy on top of her. Her kisses were eager, but his almost feral. She was finding it hard to keep up with him and it was starting to show. His teeth nipped at her lips in a painful manner and his hands began to rove over her body without waiting for an invitation.

Cassie liked it, she did but she also needed a moment to breathe. Roy showed no sign of loosening up his grip on her shoulder and unfortunately, she hadn't anticipated how powerful the Luthor Corp mechanical arm was.

"Uhm Roy?" Cassie whispered as he began to hungrily attack her neck with kisses.

"What." He growled pausing the rhythmic way his body grinded against Cassie's. "What." He repeated, it wasn't the smooth flirtatious tone she was used to hearing from the archer but instead low, gruff and annoyed. He waited a second for her to speak.

"I – I." Cassie stuttered. She wasn't sure what to say, she got herself into this position and she wasn't sure if she wanted out. She couldn't see his eyes behind his mask but she was sure the soft shy look she imagined earlier was no longer there.

The second was up and his lips crashed back down onto hers without warning, causing their teeth to clash painfully against each other. But Roy didn't flinch, his tongue shoved down her throat in a crude, erratic manner. His movements were no longer affectionate or even passionate. It was as if he was angry.

At her?

No, Cassie didn't do anything, but she was about to. Her first time was not going to be on a cold table in a dark, musty warehouse whilst in a chokehold by an almost deranged guy whose clone version was clearly not known for being a gentleman in the first place.

"Okay! Roy?" She began again, trying hard to not to focus on the feel of his fingers on her pelvis, toying with her waistband but instead the iron grip of his robotic ones. "You need to stop."

"Why!" Roy 's sudden yell felt like a vicious slap. "You don't want me anymore is that it?" He asked in an accusatory tone, his nose flaring with anger. At least he put some space between them and was no longer continuing with his vicious interpretation of a make out session.

It was the only reason she didn't punch him angrily in the face.

"Dude, we're freshmen!" She cried out trying to appeal to his common sense but he just scoffed at her. Cassie frowned and decided to make it as clear as possible. "I'm sorry but you are moving way too fast for me."

As soon as she uttered those words Roy eased up a little more, he was no longer touching her, but his legs were still acting as barricades preventing her from getting up.

"I am or should be 23 years old!" Roy's voice was strangled with pain. He said the words without really looking at her, as if shouting at someone invisible to Cassie. "Damn it." He breathed. "Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! DAMN IT!"

Cassie's eyelids shut, not only shielding her from the spit that flew from his open mouth as he shouted but also having to see Roy's handsome face contorted with rage. Deep down, most of all, what she was trying to hide was how those almost inhuman cries were beginning to terrify her.

After few minutes he hadn't stopped screaming and Cassie had run out of patience.

"That's what this was about? You're trying to deafen me because you wanted to…with me just for that reason?" Cassie was feeling furious, with Roy, with this entire situation but most of all she was just angry and disappointed with herself. She knew what a mess of person he was – they all knew. And yet she let him get _this close to_ her_._

_My mistake_, she thought, with one easy shove she pushed Roy right off of her. Whilst re-tying the strings on her tracksuit bottoms and fixing her dishevelled bangs into their usual messy place, out of the corner of her eye she could see Roy's slumped over on the floor.

He looked so…pathetic; she felt almost felt bad for him. _Almost. _ Years of captivity and torture did this to him – not me, Cassie reminded herself. His issues were no excuse to lose it the way he did. But no matter how hard Cassie tried to reassure herself that this was not her fault she couldn't help but feel she should have heeded everyone's warnings about even befriending Roy let alone getting intimate with him. Maybe she wasn't responsible for his problems but she just added to them.

She should have listened.

"He's a mess," Robin had complained to her and Batgirl just last week after a particularly bad mission for him. "He is a dangerous variable we can't account for. Nightwing shouldn't have made us work with him. He shouldn't be around people. Not yet, not like this."

Cassie had thought the words to be harsh and unfair. "We all need people," She told him in return "How else are we supposed to get better when we're hurting?"

But now she was no longer sure about her words. Roy was still in the same place – where she threw him. Cassie was frowning, what was she supposed to do now? Just stand here and watch? She bit at her lips; her hands balled into small but powerful fists were beginning to sweat uncomfortably.

"I am…" His voice broke, she couldn't see his face but she could hear it in his voice. He began to sob quietly for a moment. Tears would be hidden under the eye mask, but Cassie still had to hear them and they made her stomach want to turn.

"I am…you know…I _really_ am." He whispered between sobs.

How did she feel about this? How was she supposed to feel about this?

"I wasn't going to….I would never." His voice had an anxious edge to it. He managed to muster the strength to pick himself up off of the ground and looked Cassie straight in the eye. "Please?" An almost inaudible whisper escaped his trembling lips.

She didn't want to deal with this. This wasn't her fault and she had nothing else to say to him.

"You didn't hurt me, well not physically." She finally said no longer being able to take the tense atmosphere. "It's not like you could even if you tried." She shot him a threatening glance she didn't intend to.

"I wouldn't. Ever!" Roy cried out immediately "I wouldn't Cassie." A desperate plea for her to understand. He then swore under his breath.

She wasn't sure if he was in a position to make such a promise. Did he know what he looked like a moment ago, no mask could hide that maniac look she caught a glimpse of. And those savage screams that sent shivers down her spine. Did he really not see what he looked like? Maybe, Cassie thought, maybe he didn't want to. There was a frustrated look on his face at the moment, like he wanted to make her believe words he didn't believe himself.

Cassie decided to approach him. After a deep breath, she gently placed her hand on his shoulder.

"I know," There was look in her clear blue eyes Roy was surprised to see. "I know you wouldn't." She continued in the most sincere voice she could muster.

Roy slowly began to smile sadly, his shoulders were no longer tense.

"You don't believe that. You want to. But you don't." Roy whispered. Catching the speed at which Cassie removed her hand when he tried to reach for it, he sighed.

It was like she confirmed what he already knew – No one wanted him, not anymore.

Cassie didn't say anything. Thankfully she didn't have to either as the door opened revealing Nightwing's arrival.

"You guys are early. You know, didn't have to be in this early." He commented as he headed to the monitor.

"Yeah," Cassie replied with an awkward laugh. "I wish I didn't bother coming in when I did." She was careful to avoid making any eye contact with Roy as she returned to her seat.

She didn't have to see the look of acceptance to know it was there on Roy's face. It stung at her heart but there was no strength in her for another lie. Roy was silently watching her as Nightwing prepared the mission briefing. The rest of team slowly began to arrive and greeting them as if nothing happened was harder than it should have been.

"Everyone here?" Nightwing asked, "Good let's begin."

Cassie found herself rubbing at her neck trying to erase the heat signature left by Roy Harper's lips. She closed her eyes and tried to forget. However, it was Nightwing's voice that was more like a distant memory when all she could feel in her mind was Roy's hands all over her body again.

Forget him and those kisses that ate away at your skin like acid.

Cassie opened her eyes, her stomach began to turn once more but this time she realised what it was. She was worried sick.

The kisses, his heat, _those screams_.

She couldn't forget, but that wasn't what concerned.

Honestly, it was a simple smile that scared her.

That beautiful smile, stuck in her mind with an adhesive so strong, no amount of acid in the world could make it go away.

That…and way it made her _feel_.


	3. Chapter 3

**Pairing: **Cassie Sandsmark (Wonder Girl)/Roy Harper (Arsenal) – Wondergun

**Genre: **Romance (with maybe a hint of angst sprinkled here and there)

**Summary: **It takes a girl with super human strength to carry all that baggage Roy Harper has. Cassie Sandsmark only hopes she doesn't trip over this.

**Warnings: **Nothing to heavy but something that might make you sweat a little.

**A/N: **This chapter is long and mess, forgive me. I hope you don't hate it too much. (Usual disclaimers apply).

**CHAPTER THREE**

"Superboy, Wonder Girl, and – "

A desperate frown was pasted onto Cassie's face and a constant prayer was being played on repeat inside her mind.

_Not Roy, please Nightwing not Roy._

But no matter how she begged with her big blue eyes, no matter how hard she breathed panicked shallow breaths, Nightwing's mind remained impervious to any telepathic suggestions from the young blonde.

" – and Arsenal will be Alpha team."

What did I expect, she groaned internally to herself. I excrete a pheromone that attracts stupidity and danger to me – in other words Roy Harper hyphen The Problematic One.

Roy gave her a civil nod as he walked past her towards Superboy for further instructions regarding the mission. That brief look casually acknowledging her made Cassie instantly feel bad for how she felt about him.

_He's crazy, I kissed him, he's crazy, I kissed him, he's crazy, I kissed him, crazy…._

Cassie tried to not think about how crazy he made her feel. She couldn't kiss him again, that much she knew. It was simple; after all, she didn't think anything inside her could _still _feel drawn to Roy Harper after what happened between them. But she couldn't risk it. She couldn't risk letting impulse or sympathy or something _worse _get in the way.

Roy was able to walk past and nod at her.

_Playing my part as a professional_, that simple nod said. Unfortunately, Cassie wasn't the type to compartmentalise as easily as Roy Harper and she couldn't stop her guts from twisting with worry and fear.

"Ehm, Nightwing!" The teenaged heroine called out, not wanting to waste another second she jumped up from her seat to chase down her only chance at escaping this mess. Once Cassie got Nightwing's attention she took a deep breath and a moment to carefully think about how best to break the news to him.

"What's up Cassie?" He waited patiently for her to speak.

"I can't do this!" She shrieked throwing her arms up in the air and waving them like a white flag. "I can't!"

A quizzical look formed behind Nightwing's mask and Cassie swore she could hear her brain vacate the building.

"I meant, could I sit this one out? Please?" She tried again in a calmer tone, afraid to look behind her and see if anyone else had heard her confession.

"What's wrong?" Nightwing whispered after a moment.

"I don't want to do _this_." Cassie said bluntly, she was beginning to feel frustrated at her inability to formulate any of proper sentences to help explain what she was after. "I don't want to." She shook her head furiously. "Don't make me, okay?" She spoke the words softly, a murmur for only Nightwing to hear.

The team leader looked disconcerted at Cassie's frantic reaction. He gently grabbed hold of her elbow and directed her to a more private corner of the room. They needed to talk but not like this, Cassie thought. Nevertheless she followed him.

"And why is that." Nightwing asked, he was trying to understand but Cassie wasn't making it any easier for him.

She could have said anything, faked an injury or illness. A family emergency or personal crisis but Cassie could hardly lie to herself these days, let alone another person. She couldn't be around Roy, not without her doing something she'd definitely regret.

"Can't work with Arsenal." She finally admitted.

"Did something happen?" Nightwing looked concerned; it was as if the archer's name set off warning bells within him. "You can trust me, is there something I should be worried about?"

"N-no. I mean yes, after what happened with Robin, Blue Beetle and Impulse, I don't think he's ready to be on our team." It was a low blow and Cassie hated herself for it but she had no other choice. Nightwing frowned and she could tell he wasn't buying it. Besides, it didn't take someone trained by _the_ Batman to see through her. Maybe he had already heard about the unfortunate kiss that began this entire mess.

"I mean please can't I work with Barbara or Karen? I get on with them_much_ better."

"These are serious missions Cassie. You can't pick your team mates based on whether or not you like the same TV shows." Nightwing sounded disappointed as if he expected better from her. "Now unless you can tell me a better reason for wanting to be reassigned I can't help you here."

Cassie lowered her eyes trying her best to disguise the crestfallen look on her face. She didn't want to _tattle_ on Roy, maybe this was a mistake but his problems weren't hers to divulge to anyone else. Even if it meant lying to and disappointing Nightwing.

Cassie just wanted to curl up and cry, but she refused to let the tears fall.

She could hardly deal a lecture from Nightwing on a good day and this was anything but _a good day_.

"You're one of our heavy hitters, we need you on this." Nightwing added clearly sensing the strong feelings of dejection coming from the young girl. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Whatever it is that you are worried about, I know you can handle it."

Cassie nodded after a moment, she could feel the tears building up inside of her subside. Just in time as well, Cassie thought, noticing Conner and Roy's approach. The boys came to find her as they were ready to carry out their mission objectives.

"You, Superboy and Arsenal made an effective strike force last time," Nightwing addressed all three of them, trying to ease the tension and clearly cover for Cassie.

Roy took one look at Cassie standing beside Nightwing before scoffing angrily.

_He knows_, Cassie panicked and avoided his gaze. _He knows I have been talking about him._

"You can say it Nightwing, I am not an asset to this team. You just need me with people who will be strong enough to put me down if I go off mission again." She could still feel Roy glaring at her through narrowed eyes as he spoke.

Before Nightwing could respond the archer briskly walked away.

"What's his problem?" Conner's furled eyebrows were a clear indication of how he felt about being left out of the loop. So, Cassie wasn't surprised when Nightwing asked the Kyrptonian to stay back for a moment and although he claimed to only need to have _a few extra words with Superboy relating to the mission_, the young blonde knew better than to believe him.

It is without a doubt going to be about Roy and I, Cassie groaned, but there was nothing she could do about it and no point in staying to find out for sure. Accepting her dismissal, she walked out of the building and made her way towards Miss Martian's bioship.

"This is just wonderful." She let out a tired sigh that kept the strands of hair from her messy bangs out of her eyes.

"Look if this is going to awkward for you, then maybe it is _you_ that shouldn't be here."

Cassie jumped at the sudden voice behind her.

"You and not me." It was Roy and he didn't look happy.

"Awkward was all that yelling in my face you did after slobbering all over me like an untrained Labrador!" Cassie wanted to so desperately shout at him. But Cassie wasn't cruel, so she didn't.

And in part also because she was afraid of what his response was going to be.

_You started it Cassie; you stuck your tongue into my mouth first._

_And you liked it._

Cassie tried to silence those thoughts that had been plaguing since the moment she kissed Roy Harper. Instead of responding to the bait and get dragged into a verbal death match, she shrugged her shoulders and continued to make her way to where the bioship was parked.

"Yeah well I tried" She muttered under breath, she knew there was a chance that he could hear her but she didn't care. She needed to get it off her chest, even if it meant muttering to herself like a senile woman with cats. "But just when I thought I was out, _they pull me back in_."

Cassie could hear Roy chuckle behind her as he followed her. At a safe distance, she observed. He must not trust himself either.

"Great," There was laughter in his voice but it sounded bitter and sad. "You just _had to_ make it difficult to get over you."

Cassie paused for a moment.

"She quotes DeNiro and kicks ass. What more could a guy ask for."

Cassie froze at the comment; she was surprised to hear that Roy Harper thought there was something more between them – something that meant he would mourn losing her.

He walked past her to lean against the bioship where he examined his weaponised arm to make sure it was battle ready. However, before she was able to talk herself out of it, Cassie swiftly approached him. It was strange standing face to face with him after all that happened. Up close she could see that soft look of surprise spread across his face once more. That look, it was the exact same look she saw before she made the mistake of kissing him.

"Roy you can't say things like that." Cassie whispered, for the first time since the incident on the conference table, she was looking him straight in the eyes and pleading with him.

Roy leaned in closer and shook his head. "Why? Because it makes it difficult for you to get over me?"

"There can't be an _us_ for either of us to get over!" Cassie spat back.

"Don't you think I know that!" Roy said through gritted teeth, his fist was clenched and white with rage.

That mechanical arm wasn't the only gift from Luthor Corp, Cassie thought,_that temper _– the reason why there cannot be an _us._

Cassie took a step back and Roy noticed. Regretting his tone, he reached out to touch her but then thought better of it. Cassie only hoped he did not notice the way she tensed up at that gesture.

"I can't let myself get involved with you, not when you're like this." Cassie whispered. She was finding it difficult to speak clearly. She didn't want it to be this way, but the reality of the situation was a hard thing to swallow and Cassie found her voice break.

_Don't cry Wonder Girl. There wasn't anything between you to grieve over. _

"I mean, I know." He hung his head in shame. "I'm…whatever Red Arrow and Cheshire bothered salvaging from Luthor's lunatic scientists. I am barely holding it together as it is." His voice was raw with emotion and unlike Cassie; he either could not or would not hide it.

Why was he telling her this, Cassie wondered, did he not realise this was making it harder for her to walk away. Or was that the point? Cassie found herself wishing she could hate him. Hate those soft lips she kissed and the bittersweet brand of emotional blackmail that came with it in small print.

"I'm only saying this to you because lying would be pointless." Roy continued. "You saw me, the real me. And there are just some things all the evil genius and money in the world can't fix." He gestured wryly at his arm.

"So, you don't have to worry Cassie. I know."

Cassie didn't need to hear him say it. It hurt her, but this was for the best. As much as she wanted to pity him and be there for him, she couldn't be responsible for what happened to Roy all those years. It was a super human burden that would surely crush her. It made her feel sick and selfish to do this but what else could she do.

Roy sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "I know, you could never feel the way I want to feel about you." The tone was sincere but also cruel. The way he looked straight at her whilst shifting the entire blame onto her shocked Cassie. _Why couldn't you be strong enough to love me Cassie, _those accusing eyes said.

"I know you are able to walk away from this because I shouldn't mean anything to you." Roy continued to say, his words stabbing at her relentlessly.

"Then why are you saying these things!" Cassie was angry, she felt herself wanting to throw up. She couldn't believe the things that were coming from Roy Harper's hateful mouth. How could he be so unfair? "If you feel so much for me, then why are you being like this?"

"Because," He looked her dead straight in the eyes and bit angrily on his lip for a moment. "It's only fair _this_ is as difficult for you as it is for _me_."

No longer being able to stomach looking at him, Cassie turned to walk away but he blocked her path. She gasped feeling his touch on her arm again; it was a gentle touch that somehow still managed to squeeze the life out of her.

She tried to take a step back but he suddenly grabbed hold of her wrist and pulled her closer. She could feel his hot breath on her face, branding her a selfish coward.

"It's childish, it's cruel and it's pathetic. But I want you to know how I _feel_even if it hurts _you_." There was no mercy in that touch, just desperate anger in metal fingers that wrapped themselves around her.

"I liked you." Cassie whispered, fighting back her tears. "I really did." Her voice was threatening to break, unable to stand the way Roy looked at her which such rage.

"How can you be like this?" Cassie gasped; she could feel her heart hammering against her chest painfully. "So bitter and twisted."

"I never wanted to be your Prince Charming." Roy spat back in a voice so cold she could no longer stop herself from shivering. _He disgusts me_, Cassie was sure of it.

Cassie wrung her wrist free, not reacting to the vicious way the metal scratched at her skin.

"I am not a meek little princess." She hissed at him, trying to fight back a tidal wave of hate she felt for him in that moment.

Before Roy could react she grabbed hold of his shoulders and shoved him roughly against the bioship. He winced at the sudden contact and the strength in her long fingers. "Your pain gives you no excuse to hurt me." She could feel Roy struggling to free himself from her grip and Cassie smiled dangerously at him not caring if she hurt him.

"Keep your pity, Wonder Girl. I hope it drives you as crazy as me." Roy made no attempt free himself this time and just stared at her with a defiant eyes.

"And I hope the memory of _this _chokes the life out of you." Her lips came crashing down onto his not giving him a chance to prepare for the way his body reacted. The kiss was spiteful, full of pain and regret. Cassie wasn't the type to be cruel but every cell in her body screamed that Roy deserved this. He deserved be reminded of the warmth that radiated from her body, and reminded that the fires of his rage would deny him such comfort.

She wanted to hate him, she really did, but how could it ever compare to the way he obviously felt about himself.

Momentarily, freeing himself Roy desperately pressed himself up against Cassie, hungrily attacking her lips with fresh kisses that left her face wet and her lungs without air. His attempts to move were blocked by the strength of her body that pinned him back against the bioship.

There was so much she was giving him, friction and heat but so much more she was taking pleasure in denying him. Trapping him in that narrow space between the hard surface and her iron body made Cassie feel immovable, powerful and in control. She wanted him to feel as helpless as he made her feel. She wanted him to want her the way she wanted him.

And then take it away, the exact same way he spat all over her feelings.

Finally, she let him go and he pushed her away from him. Breathing heavily, Roy was trying his hardest not to give away the pain of bruises she knew were forming on his back and upper arm. He had no choice but to wince slightly as his aching body tried to however unsteady remain standing. Once he was sure he was not going to sink to the floor, Roy let out a small chuckle.

"You know how to knock a guy off of his feet." Roy was still leaning against the bioship for support but he was no longer panting.

"Weak in the knees." Cassie asked rubbing the wetness off of her lips, she stood calmly smiling. If the kiss had taken anything out of her, there was no sign to betray that fact to Roy. She was done showing him exactly how much he had gotten under her skin.

"Not in the slightest." Roy whispered, his face hardened suddenly. "How could anything possibly hurt me anymore."

He always had the right words, the kind of words that he knew would purposely slice away at her soul.

Cassie gave a mocking laugh to match his cruelness.

"This is why I could never be with you, you're screwed up."

Roy finally managed to stand up straight without grimacing.

"Stay away from me." She pointed her finger as a warning, but Roy took several purposeful steps towards her. Cassie felt herself stand firmly ready to defend herself with force if she needed to.

"I'm not going to do your job for you Cassie." Roy spoke in an icy whisper." I know nothing is going to happen between us but.." A twinge of sadness however it was brief. Cassie held back a worried shudder as Roy's shoulder brushed past hers but there was no sign of him wanting anything more than to just talk to her.

And warn her.

She turned to watch him walk away and was surprised to see he had paused to glance back at her.

"You can stay away from me if you like, but I'm not going to do your job for you."

Cassie remained frozen on her spot trying to process those words Roy Harper left her with, he sounded so casual yet menacing at the same time, but then again so did most threats. However, it was worse than that. It wasn't that Roy was the problem, he warning about the real threat.

In that moment, Cassie knew what she was up against – herself.

_I kissed him again, he's crazy, I kissed him again, he's crazy, I kissed him again, he's crazy…_

I. Kissed. Him. _Again._

How on Earth was she going to stop herself from going to him?

_I'm going crazy. _


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: This chapter is late (more than late). I am so sorry but I have been finding it hard to write because of all the real life baggage. I have not quit on this and updates should be more regular for those of you kind enough to have stuck with me.

**CHAPTER FOUR**

"Maybe it's because of something in the air." Cassie muttered to herself, she stepped out of the bioship and took a glance at the vast Bialyan desert that surrounded her. What was it about this place in particular that caused her insecurities to act up like a bad allergy?

The air was cool almost chilly and the night sky provided perfect cover for the three heroes. Yet Cassie felt more exposed than ever. The last time she was here, everything fell to pieces and although she somehow managed to salvage the mission earning congratulatory hug from her friends, she could not shrug off that bad feeling that things would be much harder this time round.

They were still a considerable distance from their target, an ancient palace turned tactical base in a country crawling with corrupt government officials and proven impervious to the scrutiny of the international community. It was a delicate mission requiring absolute discretion so as to not spark an international incident. So, Cassie wondered, why had Nightwing trusted the three of them with extracting crucial information from right under the nose of the deadly despot and ally to the ominous Light, Queen Bee?

Surely the Batfolk would have been the obvious choice when it came to espionage?

"Listen up guys."

Cassie had no more time to dwell on her doubts as Conner began to address her and Roy. "No psychic link on this mission and complete radio silence." He reminded them.

"You know what that means?"

Cassie felt herself groan internally for the hundredth time.

_It means no one to bail me out when I inevitably screw up._

"It means keep to your objectives." Conner responded as if he read her mind, it somehow made her feel even more uncomfortable.

"And if something goes wrong?" She whispered trying not to sound as anxious as she felt.

"Kryptonian super hearing." He added with a small smile like a period at end of a sentence. Cassie knew the smile was just for her benefit so she gave him a nod and prayed she wouldn't let him down.

Roy was silent and stood beside her. The archer traded in his usual smart-mouth charm for this new taciturn identity. If Cassie hadn't witnessed Conner berate him earlier on the bioship for asking too many unnecessary questions, she would have taken this cold shoulder personally. But somehow everything with Roy Harper felt _personal_.

Even if peace, quiet and distance was what she asked for it still felt strange. It was as if her entire body was humming, panicked skin dancing whenever Roy stood next to her. Things should have been different now, but for some reason they weren't – she was still a mess.

All of sudden she felt Conner's steely blue eyes on her, examining her tense face.

"I'm good!" She cried out. "Retrieving disks. I get it. Be your shadow." She quickly muttered before he could comment on her clear uneasiness. "I know what I'm doing. Provide cover. Extraction if necessary. Let you do your job by doing mine."

Conner nodded.

"And if Devastation rears her ugly head, I brought fireworks and pretty lights to distract her." Roy spoke for the first time since they left the bioship and it surprised Cassie to see he was looking right at her. Especially since he had avoided her gaze throughout the entire flight. "You two just worry about looking pretty." He added with a bright comforting smile.

Cassie didn't blush fiercely or even twitch nervously at the casual comment. Instead she found herself giggling.

"If you wanted pretty Arsenal, you should have kept the tights." She whispered back. She hadn't expected this, she hadn't intended on it being this easy to fall back into their usual routine of casually flirting but for some reason Roy was smiling at her and she was smiling at him.

"Alas, no tights. But you got my back Wonder Girl, so I've no reason to worry about anything happening to this handsome face."

Roy winked at her.

_And I got yours, _it said.

She believed him.

_So this was what denial felt like_. She had always thought it must be exhausting for Roy Harper to keep that carefree cocky smile sitting so perfectly on his handsome face but she finally understood how easily one could end up believing the lies they told themselves.

As easy as laughing at his jokes. As easy as wanting to rely on him. As easy as a peck on the cheek.

"Arsenal - "

"Yes, I have Nightwing's little gift for Queen Bee." Roy's retort came in quick, before Conner had even asked the question he was about to ask. "Yes, I know how to upload it and corrupt the network. Yes, I won't leave my post. Yes, I got it all covered." Roy sounded a little more agitated than he intended and Cassie could tell he was getting annoyed with the way Conner was persistently checking him. She couldn't help but feel a little sorry for him; it couldn't be easy trying to fit in a group where you were being constantly scrutinised.

However, when Cassie thought back to Tim's account of Roy's renegade side mission at LexCorp Farms, she couldn't deny the fact that Roy never intended on making things easier for himself in the first place and for that reason, Superboy was probably right to keep a watchful eye on him.

For a brief moment, Cassie wondered if she would have felt better with Tim watching her back but it took one glance at Roy's determined face for her to dismiss any doubts she had.

She could trust him. They all could. They just had to give him another chance.

"Watches synchronised?" Conner asked.

A quick check confirmed it.

"Go."

And on that gruff command they dispersed, each making their own way to the base with nothing in between them and the enemy but the comforting darkness.

—

Flying helped Cassie's nerves subside and her mind began to wander. Mission aside, her thoughts were now firmly fixated on the archer who raced off in the opposite direction. Would he be okay? He looked confident enough but then again when didn't he. If there was one thing she was certain of, it was that Roy Harper was a brilliant actor.

Pretending must be better than the alternative, Cassie thought grimly as she stealthily flew over the desert fortress and quite easily took her position, a security blind spot as identified by Nightwing's mysterious source. There would be no interference from the enemy combatants so long as she kept proper watch and didn't get too distracted by her thoughts concerning Roy.

She caught a glimpse of him as he made his way to the first security tower.

_Years and limbs lost_, Cassie felt sadness at the pit of her stomach as she watched him scale the walls using his robotic arm. _So many years he can never get back. _Roy had his problems, but it made sense to her why he was so determined not let Cassie's lack of better judgement be one of them.

She didn't want to add to his pain but she had to stay away. And that saddened her more than she wanted.

Fifteen minutes passed since she last saw Roy and Cassie knew it was time to move from her location and assume her secondary position. She made her way to one of three security towers opposite the one Roy entered a little while earlier. Cassie moved quickly, making no real effort to sweep the area before lying on her belly behind one of the satellite discs. She was confident that Roy had been successful in disabling security protocols and had taken out the small security detail that were positioned there earlier.

Just as she adjusted wrist watch she spotted Conner make a turn in the court yard.

Behind him a couple of armed guards.

Cassie was about to react when she realised there was no need. Conner neutralised the threat swiftly and surprisingly enough without a sound. Not waiting for a fire-fight to erupt, or for a hero's rescue from Cassie, Conner simply disappeared into night continuing with his task of retrieving the disks.

Cassie pouted feeling slightly disappointed at the lack of opportunity to do anything other than lie in wait. She couldn't help but feel like her placement in the areas less prone to action was intentional. Her job, to be perfectly honest, was boring.

Except for the first position, her subsequent locations would be places the boys had already been and disarmed security, providing her with no reason to test out her combat skills on Bialyan troops. _Just covering our butts, _Nightwing had explained when he first gave them their orders. _Exploiting their_ _strategic weak points without exposing ours._

Strategic weak point. Cassie felt that phrase summed up her pretty well.

Even Roy despite the team's suspicions was trusted to run on his own. Cassie tried not to feel too bitter, instead she reminded herself of the way both Nightwing and Conner quizzed the young archer.

Roy had it far from easy.

However, feeling 'sorry' for someone cannot be the basis for a relationship. She wanted a _John Hughes_ film kind of first love, something to gush over with the girls. Stress-free with cake and candles in a school canteen. Not something as angst filled and problematic as a _Stephanie Meyers _novel.

She could imagine what M'gann would say to her – a relationship with Roy would be the kind of unnecessary drama a sensible cheerful girl like Cassie could do without.

The kind I probably couldn't handle, Cassie thought, if I'm trying to be brutally honest.

But she couldn't be nor did she want to.

A couple of words with Roy and she would always be yo-yoing between being in a state of constant doubt and a place of desire and overcompensating confidence. It was obvious she would end up getting hurt and it wouldn't just be his fault. It would be hers too, for not heeding warning signs.

On some level, despite the awful things he said, Cassie knew that Roy Harper didn't want to hurt her and that's what made it hard. Harder to let go of what could have been between them.

Cassie had excellent rapport with all her team mates but with Roy it was different. Primal attraction, fierce and foolish.

_And quite possibly fantastic. _

Cassie glanced at her watch. _Twenty-two minutes, _Roy should have returned by now. Then again, he was running late by just two minutes.

But that was two minutes too long for Cassie. Anxious to prove herself and worried about Roy, Cassie was about to propel herself off the building and go after him when suddenly she caught sight of something or someone.

_It must be Roy, _relief washed over. Just the anticipation of seeing him was like experiencing fireworks on a subatomic level – it thrilled and terrified her.

To Cassie the sheer intensity of that feeling was something unexpected.

However, nothing could be compared to overwhelming panic she felt the moment Devastation's large figure emerged from the shadows; standing where Roy's should have been.

With a predatory yet satisfied smirk on her vicious face the giantess looked up and straight at Cassie.

"No." Cassie's heart sank; another word fell out of her mouth.

"Please no."


End file.
